Horny Chav Bake Gets a group of lads so horny, and all they can do is wear sports clothes while doing so this is a fast acting bake, combined with the most needed vitamins and minerals to keep them at it like rabbits for hours. Once they’re in gear, their tongues twist and only respond with cocky slang. With every word, their accent travels down to a thick scouse variety.

Read More Posted Fri Sep 16, 2016 | 116 Words | Tagged story tf cookbook chav accent

ukscallies: 🇬🇧 http://ukscallies.tumblr.com 🇬🇧 He wished on a shooting star, out alone one night. He wished for things to be different, for him to not live this life of constantly having to be “the best” everyone expected him to be. It really grinded on him how everyone he interacted with expected this and yet all around him were people who were relaxed, nothing expected of them and enjoying themselves. The shooting star in question saw deep down what he wanted.

Read More Posted Sun Jul 10, 2016 | 237 Words | Tagged story chav

ukscallies: 🇬🇧 http://ukscallies.tumblr.com 🇬🇧 He was out on a night out in a city he didn’t know. His friends had gone separate ways, all out of their minds drunk. He ended up in some takeaway in a bad part of town, in whatever was left of his smart shirt. Another lad nearby noticed him, and thought to help him out. Taking off his trainer and shoving it in his face, the smell slowly started wafting into his nose.

Read More Posted Sat Jun 18, 2016 | 169 Words | Tagged story chav

I was walking down the road, just on my way into town when the guy leaning on the bike rack, not a care in the world, smoking as guys of this kind would normally do. I was in a bit of a short tempered mood, as sometimes I would be. It was not a good day for the lad to blow a load of smoke into my face, “What the fuck was that for?

Read More Posted Wed May 18, 2016 | 181 Words | Tagged story chav

You were having a period where yet again you seemed to be exhausted over doing anything and having half awake periods daydreaming of various things. One time you daydreamed seeing a product on your phone, a bunch of spliffs advertised to bring out the inner brickie in you. What you didn’t expect was for them to turn up through your letterbox a day later. You read it over and it was exactly how you remember them to be during your daydream.

Read More Posted Fri Apr 22, 2016 | 268 Words | Tagged story chav workie accent

You wanted to change everything didn’t you? Just down the can and you’ll wake up feeling how you want to feel. You lapped up the offer, sick of everything. You woke up in your mates house remembering parts of two lives. The new life, the one you crave feeling so good. The new life, with a new name, new memories, new mates, new feelings. More importantly, the new attitude showing through.

Read More Posted Thu Apr 21, 2016 | 133 Words | Tagged story chav accent

He looked down at his phone. Some guy was texting him about going for drinks like he was his mate. He tried to tell him he got the wrong number, but each time made him feel even more confused. Yeah, he was in the right house. The one with the old furniture. Bit scruffy but nice enough. Ding. His trackies felt slightly off. Course he always wore them, why would they feel off.

Read More Posted Fri Mar 18, 2016 | 142 Words | Tagged story chav

I sat down finally on the platform absolutely nackered, ready to go home on the train. A few minutes later, another person appears on the platform. Being a Sunday evening the station was usually empty. He walked past talking on the phone to one of his mates, trying to be quiet but loud enough you could hear his voice. Deep, slightly croaky but rough enough to make me interested.

Read More Posted Mon Mar 7, 2016 | 460 Words | Tagged story chav bodyswap

When you move to a new place, it can be interesting. New people around, things the estate agents don’t tell you. First you find it interesting, the amount of tracksuits you see. Then you realise, you’ve moved into an estate. There’s nothing you can do though, you’ve signed the lease for 12 months. One of them greets you, he seems nice. Bit demanding but approachable at least. It started with him almost begging me to wear some of his older clothes, it looked a bit silly, but they were comfy and it pleased him.

Read More Posted Fri Feb 19, 2016 | 187 Words | Tagged story chav

He said on his profile he loved stinky used shoes and he was up for new experiences. What better experience than to send him some quite powerful Nikes for him to play with. What I didn’t tell him was the more he played with them, the more like the previous owner he would become. First it started with his feet, of course it had to. They grew out into the size 12s and he was proud of them.

Read More Posted Thu Feb 11, 2016 | 314 Words | Tagged story chav